My English sucks

Finally, after revisited the thesis statement several times, it’s time to circulate my draft among the co-authors. The process I have been through this month just revealed that I need my English writing skill improved badly. When I read the stuff I just wrote, which turned out to be really hard to understand, I was unable to find a clear logic flow behind those phrases. Unfortunately, that is the essential part about writing a scientific paper. Thus I realise I really need to take some time and be serious about my English. Through reading some British or American masterpieces, also mastering some new words, anyway, I should improve my English. Besides logic, I found myself often use some useless phrases whose meaning has already been presented before. In one word, I need to simplify my sentences.

Last Sunday, I just finished the PhD qualifying exam for PMO. The exam on galaxies is really hard for me. Maybe that’s because I have forgotten a lot. However, I think the ISM and English part is not too bad. That means I need to take out some time carefully reading the textbooks on galaxies, for they are the foundations.

In about 2 months, I will graduate as a master in Astrophysics. Good luck to myself.

Purity of the Pursuit

I am isolated with a feeling of strong depressing these days, being lost in the forest of nonsense. I am not sure what to do, and lack of incentive. Alone at an office, while the rests are all busy with the IAU meeting in Beijing, I was crashing by the increasing isolation.

       It’s been a long time since my last post. However, it seems that no progress has been made these months. Although I build up my Master thesis outline, moving forward on the study of H_2O lines in high-z galaxies as a second author, there’s still much more work should be done about the Herschel Archive data, while what I did is far from enough. I am feeling like being closed by myself in a purely procrastinate life style, wasting the most precious golden lifetime. Shame on me. Such a situation reminds me of a friend, who also expressed same problems when in the 2nd semester that buried his talent in the end. I can not focus on forming a complete logic flow because of the fragmentized thinking mode caused by SNS and Twitter-like Internet media. I feel stupid and biased. Even now I can not clearly write down my thoughts. Moreover, knowing what exactly I was thinking is barely possible. Maybe reading books and papers is the way to cure, but the most important thing is to quit the Internet, the SNS and Twitter things, for recovering the ability to complete my thread.

        There’s always something coming to my mind that reminds me about my initial pursuit and drives me to who I am today. Sometimes I doubt whether I am suitable to be a real astronomer, living in a non-wealthy life and working hard on the science projects. But it has been my dream since I was a child, I love learning about the universe, and making fascinating discoveries of it. Whatever, I am scared to be lonely, and that is my difficult situation in the current environment. Although I understand that being an astronomer does not mean you have to bear the loneliness, for you have so active scientific communication, and teamwork can not be avoided in modern astrophysics research as well. So, such isolation may be just one special case, or environment related. What really matters may be me, on the second thought. It is me, being lazy and autistic. If I am active to talk with the researchers and students around, and if I keep reading and making progress every day. I would not be so depressed. How ludicrous a person I am!

        The decision-making day is coming. I have to make up my mind to decide whether to stay or leave. But now I am evading the truth, the day that will finally come. I am not acting like a real man about this. Thus, I need to think more about this, the projects that I would lose and get, and what I want to achieve in the future.

A new start

From the busy proposal works this week, I realised that there’s a huge gap between my actual English ability and the level I need. Things are forming this gap, the grammar mistakes, the poorly organised logic flows and even the spell mistakes.

So, actions should be taken to smaller this gap. In short, I need to practice my English.

Well, so you may have guessed what I mean. Yep, I decided to write some of my posts in English. And I think this would help me. Therefore, I need you readers helping me find the mistakes in this blog, and it would be so kind of you doing that. Anyway, and also the most exciting thing, I may get the chance to be under the supervision of a very kind and excellent astronomer in IAP (Paris) for 2~3 months, and I think that may be a great chance to do something that can really help me to approach the truth of our universe. So, several reviews are already on my reading list now. All I need is hard working and be prepared for the coming days.